Tuesday, June 3, 2008

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An article I translated
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studentyoung -

After reading the thread, I translated the article below.
http://www. From Beijing Chinese School for
expatriate such as www.thatsbj.com and http://asiaxpat.com. Threads with titles such as "Why
foreign women will NEVER have a dating scene" and "How can a woman find a man?" are becoming
increasingly popular.
孤独的外籍女士在华约会难的问题成为诸如:www.thatsbj.com and
http://asiaxpat.com 等外籍人士在线论坛上的热门问题。题如:“为何外籍女士�
�是呆在被约会遗忘的角落”和
“如何找到你心目中的白马王子”之类的讨论变得越来越受欢迎。

"I have lived in Asia for about four years now and know how tall blondes are treated by a lot of
the men here," said MTGirl, who posted on a "Frustrated woman" thread on thatsbj.com's Love and
Dating forum. "Although that has not turned me into a man-hater, I find the situation
frustrating.”
在thatsbj.com的爱与约会论坛上,一位网名叫MTGirl的网友在一处题为“心灰意�
�的女人“的讨论中,说到:“我在亚洲呆了4年了,深知这里的许多男人是�
�样对待那些身材修长的金发女郎。虽然,这种情况还不至于把我变得要憎恨
男人,但我发现情况让人心灰意冷。”

Offline, MTGirl is Juanita Hartman, 33, who came to Beijing from Ellensburg, Washington, as a
research fellow studying Chinese history at Peking University.
离线时,MTGirl的本名叫琼妮塔•哈特曼。她从华盛顿的艾伦斯伯格到北京,�
��北京大学搞中国历史研究。

She says that even though foreign men in Beijing are available, she has seen that they are
likelier to seek local women.
她说尽管北京有外籍男人士,但目之所及,他们都倾向于找当地的女士。

"It really doesn't bother me that they overlook expat women," Hartman said. "What bothers me are
the looks of disdain I get when I'm out and about.”
“他们对外籍女士熟视无睹,但这于我而言倒也没什么。真正叫我觉得有什�
��的是当我在他们身边走过路过时,他们对我一脸的冷漠。”

"Men look away when eye contact is made," she said. "I'm not drop-dead gorgeous, but I'm not
butt-ugly, either.”
她说:“当我跟他们四目想投时,他们立刻就把视线转移。我非沉鱼落雁,�
��月羞花,但也不是什么丑八怪呀。”

"Living in China for about four years has given me great insight to who I am and what I want. Part
of that self-discovery has been that I haven't had a steady boyfriend and had to struggle through
comparing myself to these beautiful, petite Chinese girls.”
“在中国呆了四年,我深刻地了解到我是谁、我要什么。在自我发现中,我�
��道我还没有稳定的男朋友,还不得拿自己与那些娇媚可人的中国姑娘比较�
�”

"I am 176 centimetres tall and often felt like a bull in a china shop - no pun intended. I have
come to terms with the way I look and the way I am built. I am more confident because of this
experience.”
“我身高1米76,到了中国的商店,常觉得自己像头牛——绝对不夸张。我已�
��跟自己的长相和行为方式妥协了。有了这些经历,我更自信了。”

For China's lonely "laowai" ladies, it seems the problem is a matter of not only the quantity of
men, but also the quality.
对于在华的寂寞老外女士来说,似乎不止是男人量的问题,而且是男人质的�
��题。

Many foreign women complain that the fabric of the men who are attracted to the expatriate
lifestyle is too often different from that of good dating material.
许多外籍女士抱怨,那些受西方生活方式所吸引的男士,他们通常都不是什�
��约会的好材料。

"Beijing seems to attract only certain types of guys: English-teacher types straight out of
college who just want to have fun, ladder-climbing executive types and a bunch of weirdoes," said
Emily Patterson, 23, of Cleveland, Ohio, who works as a reporter for a Chinese magazine in
Beijing. "You don't want a college guy. Maybe the executive type is already married, busy or
boring. And of course, you don't want to date a weirdo.”
艾美丽•帕特森23岁,来自俄亥俄州,克里夫兰,目前给北京一家中文杂志�
�记者。她说:“北京似乎就吸引那么几类男人。要么就刚大学毕业,到这儿
来当英文老师,他们就知道玩;要么就是那些在职场上往上爬的经理;再有�
��是一大堆光怪陆离的家伙。你不想要那些初出校门的小毛头。可能那些经�
�都已有家室了,忙得要死,闷得要命。当然啦,你也不想找个光怪陆离的家
伙。”

"At home, maybe you meet a hundred nice, normal, single, socially, capable guys, and you have
feelings for one or two. Here you meet five normal guys, and there's such a small chance that one
of them is the one you want.”
“要是在国内(美国),你会遇到上百个条件不错,中规中矩,讨人喜欢又�
��明能干的男人,你总会对其中的一两个来电。在这呢,你碰上五个中规中�
�的男人,但是从中找到你喜欢的,机会相当渺茫。”

Hartman agrees: "I think the main problem in Beijing is that most of the men here I wouldn't touch
back home, so why would I here?”
哈特曼说:“我认为主要的问题是,在北京的大多数的男人是那些我在国内�
��不考虑的,我为啥要在这里选择他们呢?”

Like many expatriate women in China, Hartman believes that while "a few" laowai guys in China are
worthwhile men, capable of establishing solid relationships, many come here to get a badly needed
ego boost.
像许多在华的外籍女士一样,哈特曼相信有那么一部分在华的男老外是好男�
��,他们有能力建立稳固的关系, 许多来到这里迫切地想要自我提升。

For these reasons, these women see the pool of single, dateable foreign men more as a small
puddle. And they don't consider dating locals a viable option
出于这些原因,这些女士认为可约会的单身的外籍男士简直少得可怜,可她�
��不会考虑约会当地的男人。

"Women need to communicate more, so for women who don't speak Chinese, we don't have as many
options as men," said Minnikin.
明尼金说:“女士需要更多的沟通,所以对于不说中文的女士来说,我们没�
��更多可选择的男士。”

There are cultural barriers, as well.
而且,还有文化上的隔阂。

"Most Chinese guys are really shy," Patterson said. "They work really long hours and don't come
out to bars and parties, which is where you usually meet people.
帕特森说:“大部分的中国男士都非常害羞。他们的工作时间很常,很少到�
��吧去或参加派对,可那些场合都是你常去见人的地方。

Josh Bernstein, 21, of Phoenix, Arizona, has organized an informal singles group and has seen
first-hand the difficulties faced by Western women interested in Chinese men.
来自阿里桑那州凤凰城,21岁的乔书•本斯庭组织了一个非正式的单身组织�
�并直接地了解到西方女士要跟中国男人“来电”所面对的困难。

The singles party he hosted a week ago attracted more than 20 Chinese women, four Western women,
10 foreign men and two Chinese men
一周前,他搞了个单身派对,引来了20个中国女士,4个西方女士,10个西方�
�士2个中国男士。

He said that while the foreign men ignored the Western girls, the Chinese men struck up
conversation with them. But in the end, it was only talk.
他说,当外籍男士无视外籍女士时,中国的男士开始跟她们交谈。但一直到�
��动结束,他们都仅限于交谈。

"These foreign girls, even though they talk to the guys who they are interested in and think are
interested in them, the Chinese guys seem to be too shy or too worried about saving face to make a
move," Bernstein said. "They're afraid of making a mistake because of cultural differences. A lot
of Chinese guys don't know about foreign girls and don't know how to approach them.
本斯庭说:“这些外籍女士,尽管她们跟这些中国男士交谈,彼此之间也有�
��意思了,但是中国男士们显得太害羞,太爱面子了,不太愿意采取进一步�
�行动。因为文化差异的原因,他们害怕出错。很多中国男士不了解外国的女
孩,也不知道该如何接近她们。”

Hartman, for one, said she has given up on the dating scene, and believes it's for the best.
哈特曼就个中人。她说她已经放弃约会,并相信这是最好的。

"I came to the conclusion that whatever happens will happen" she said. "I could find the love of
my life here and have a great story to tell, but I could also return home alone.”
她说:“我得出一个结论:该来的躲不掉。我可能会在这儿找到我一生的挚�
��,并有一段爱的传奇,但我也可能只身回国。”

"Either way, I am still learning about myself, and isn't living abroad all about the learning
experience?”
“另一方面,我还在了解我自己。而且在海外生活不就是一种生活的体验吗�
��”

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